Flicked through the calendar, I realized how time flies. Time never waits. Never ever. As I always tell myself, human may die one day, but time will never die.
The images were still clearly stored in my mind, the moment before my beloved grandma passed away. Sitting beside her bed, I hold her cold hands, talked to her. I told her that everything is gonna be all right. But she didn't say anything. Trying her best to gasp every breath that she could before she leave this world. We all know that she was unwilling to leave this world. Specifically, us, I mean her family members; her husband, sons, daughter, grandson and many more. Yet, nothing is able the stop the god from taking away her life from her weak body and soul.
My beloved grandma, a hardworking person, she don't really know how to enjoy her late life. When she was at the age of around 60 something, she still insists want to go to work. Definitely all of us are against her decision, but our advices are useless. I told her many times already. Stop going to work. It wasn't that his son can't afford giving her a good life. She just wants to work and earn money as many as possible.
After she found that she has cancer, she decided to stop working. Concentrating on fighting the evil cancer. Consulted countless number of doctors, and most of them said there is no way to cure this already. Frustrated. But, we never give up. As time goes, her condition worsen everyday. She starts to loss the ability to walk because both of her legs are energy-less. Then she started to feel pain and ache around her body. Mainly at her stomach. A foreign object was found at some where nearby the stomach. It was the cancer cell. I still remember there was a time she was admitted to the hospital and was injected morphine to reduce the pain. But it was useless... Then later she tried to use the morphine patch. Finally, the pain was over but the patch has to be replaced every three days. Never mind that as long as she won't feel and suffers from the pain.
About a month later, she had a difficulty in eating food. Specifically digest. Every single food that she swallowed into her stomach was soon being vomited out again. Heart-cutting scene. For once she told me :"When will I be able to finish a big bowl of rice?" I was speechless for a moment. Then I told her :"Don't worry. You will recover soon. Don't worry, all right?After you recover I will bring you to Penang have a seafood feast.Lobsters, King crabs, anything. Just promise me you will recover all right?" She smiled.
During this process, she has going through countless times of blood testing, IV drip, blood infusion and that makes her feel scared of the syringe because the pain is horrible and she was sick of it. And she decided not to go to any hospital or clinics anymore. She said she suffered enough pain already. We said this is for your own good. This may help in the recovery process. My dad keep on consoling her weak yet shocked little soul. But she insists. So we follow her will.
Few days later she was admitted to the hospital due to insufficient blood. The next day is the 13th of September. At the 13th morning, she had a difficulties in answering the call of nature. Lots of effort has been done to get promote urination but the effort was fruitless. Few hours later, her condition became even worse than ever. My dad decided to transfer my grandma back to her house because she told us that she don't want to die in the hospital. When we finally reached the house, my uncle walked to me and told me that she passed away already. I don't believe it. I really don't willing to believe this terrifying and cruel truth. It is just too hard for me to accept it. Without wasting much time, I move my legs towards the car she is sitting in. I stand beside her and I tell her :"Ma, we reached house d. Wake up d la. We've reached d." But she just remained silent and her body is just as cold as I hold her hand earlier. From that moment, I knew that she had leave to another world, a better world. My teardrop slide down my cheek... Goodbye my dear grandma...
Whenever there is a starting, there will be an ending for it. No matter what difficulty that you had face, never ever try to escape from the truth, you will never make it, believe me. Be a optimistic person, don't be a pessimistic person. Cheer up...
Best regards.
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